Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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