EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
love makes seman taste better
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize