Christians are straight up FREAKS
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Randomize
