Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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