Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
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