no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
