you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Randomize
