tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
