Cold hands, warm shart.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize
