So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
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