No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
