I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
