the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
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