Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
We have started to decorate penises.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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