you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
