That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize