Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
They should really pass out barf bags in church
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
He felt like a one man threesome
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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