My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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