When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I'm both gender and math confused
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
