I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
worst night to have a conscience
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Randomize