i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I smell stomach acid.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
