I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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