Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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