I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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