yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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