It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I didn't shave. On purpose
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
