Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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