So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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