i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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