I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Randomize
