Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Im part way to drunk.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
