How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
