We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
