Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
