well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
