I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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