Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
The power of my boobs compel you
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