God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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