there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
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