When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize