Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Randomize
