How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
