real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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