addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
