How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Randomize
