Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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