Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Randomize
