She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
These tits shall not be calmed
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
