well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
