why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
