Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(916): View more from California

I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...

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(256): View more from Alabama

It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..

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(513): View more from Ohio

Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.

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(703): View more from Virginia

I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.

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(301): View more from Maryland

Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent

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(512): View more from Texas

If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.

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(503): View more from Oregon

So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.

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(870): View more from Arkansas

For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do

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