is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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